Goodbye, 2024. Hello, 2025! Kick off the year with a laugh (or two) by telling these hilarious New Year’s jokes.
New Year’s isn’t just for resolutions or throwing a party (complete with fun games) with your favorite people—it’s also the perfect moment to bring on the laughs! And what better way to kick off 2025 than with a little humor? That’s right, New Year’s jokes are here to steal the show.
We’ve rounded up the funniest New Year’s jokes to make your celebrations extra joyful. Think clever one-liners, groan-worthy puns and downright hilarious punchlines. If you think funny New Year’s quotes are worthy of a few giggles, then these jokes will surely tickle your funny bone too!
So grab your favorite people—family, friends, coworkers and even the kids—and get ready to share these New Year’s jokes that will have everyone laughing their way into the new year!
- Why should you put your new calendar in the freezer?
To start off the New Year in a cool way.
- What do you tell someone you didn’t see on New Year’s Eve?
I haven’t seen you for a year!
- What happened to the man who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?
He got 12 months!
- What’s the one group that hates New Year’s Day?
The New Year’s Eve cleanup crew.
- What did Adam say to Eve on Dec. 31?
It’s New Year’s, Eve.
- Why was the telephone late for work on Jan. 1?
It was busy ringing in the new year!
- What compliment did the drink glass give to the champagne on New Year’s Eve?
“You’re so bubbly!”
- Why did the man stand on one leg at midnight on New Year’s?
He wanted to start the year on the right foot.
- What did the woman say when she was offered a raisin on New Year’s Eve?
“No thanks. I already have a date.”
- Why do birds fly south for New Year’s Eve?
Because it’s too far to walk.